Friday, March 28, 2008

Reality murder shows


All of us would agree that Television has become a part of the Indian culture. Housewives time household chores according to the relay time of their favourite soap operas. There used to be a time when a whole neighbourhood would throng to one particular house – most probably the only one in the locality to own a television set – to watch Mahabharat. Children ape their cartoon characters. A neighbour of mine- a few years older than me, broke his right arm trying to swing on a thread, trying to be ‘our friendly neighbourhood spidey’. Women rush to garment shops to invest in a saree exactly like the one a woman wore in a particular serial.

The point is – television affects us. They way we think. They way we react to situations. The way we spend, on what we spend too, thanks to advertising. And the way we talk.

Thanks to the success of the Indian Idol, ‘inspired by American Idol, Kerala has been at the receiving end of an endless string of reality shows. So much so that, people who have earlier worked on family dramas and other stories find themselves suddenly jobless. They should have seen it coming, such are trends! Scriptwriters, producers and a lot many production and post-production artists find themselves at the mercy of talent hunt shows. To name a few- Star Singer on Asianet, which is doing well, is popular and is watched not only in Kerala but all over India as well as overseas.

Then there is another show called Gandharva Sangeetam on a competing channel, which seems to be cutting production costs by compromising on sets, lights and show anchor. Star Wars, is yet another music show but with a twist- it’s a war between colleges. All three of the above are shows to find the best singing voice.
Taka Dhimi, again on Asianet aims at finding the best dancer.

What bothers me about these shows is the quality of content. The ‘content’ that I mention here includes everything that the viewer sees as the final product- everything from where the anchor starts talking to the credits. It also includes the judges’ comments.

The judges that are brought to judge the talent of the young artists are all experienced and have made their bones in their respective industry. Using that as an excuse of speaking broken, incomplete English is sheer shamelessness. We understand if you cannot speak the language properly, you can speak in the language you are most comfortable in, but to mouth English only to appear sophisticated is a cause of irritation for many.

Mistakes are allowed when performing or giving a verdict live. Television shows are pre-recorded, edited, spliced together with music and glitz and then relayed on to the box. There is a chance to rectify what wrong has been done. Either it is the laziness or failure to differentiate between the right and the wrong.

Imagine a playback singer of many years commenting on an artist’s performance. “You sang beautifully, but expression in the song was a lot of lacking.”

What a way to encourage young artists! Is that what parents want their children to hear and emulate? Doesn’t anyone think it wrong that these children would go on to do private MBA courses and corrupt the corporate world and society at large with “What you doing?” and “Where you going?”

The biggies must understand what they are saying. They must act more responsibly. Care must be taken to stop and re-shoot what has gone wrong. It will not mar the dignity of the judge to admit the wrong, apologise for it and continue with the comment nonchalantly, candidly.

One of the three judges on Taka Dhimi is Lakshmi Gopalasami, a Telugu actress who has also acted in Malayalam films. When she talks, one feels like getting an involuntary tour of South India. Gopalaswami talks in English, Tamil, Kannada, Tamil and Telugu and Malayalam- all at once. However, one cannot be rude about it, considering the effort she is taking to learn the languages that are not native to her.

Star Singer, by far has been impressive throughout. Ranjini Haridas- a former miss Kerala, is a good anchor, even though Wikipedia.com says that she has mispronounced Malayalam words now and then.

As I write this, I keep thinking of one statement that hit me. Recently, the judge for the college talent hunt show Star Wars was a famous film choreographer. She had just seen the performance of a group that performed fairly well. When asked to comment on it, the judge picked up the microphone and said, “All of you were good, but you need to be more perfection.”

Thursday, March 20, 2008

i put off the lights

when i don’t need ‘em.

that doesn’t mean

i ain’t online all night.

i use mugs of water

to bathe and to wash

my arse.

i don’t have a bicycle,

let alone a car – to hose.

my family flushes the loo

with water left from laundry.

i guess am good.

i don’t smoke,

i drink only water,

cold drinks are fine by me,

tea and coffee is cool.

i am not fussy.

i guess am good.

i use sheets of paper twice

both sides.

i can recycle paper.

i hate what plastic does.

i love animals.

i hate the big cats’

going away.

i guess am good.

i am good to people.

i hate to lie.

i love to smile.

i like laughing.

i guess am good.

i don’t cheat

on my girl,

i have only one girl,

i am loyal to her.

i believe in her.

i don’t sleep with other girls.

i don’t mind going slow,

cos there’s no hurry,

no one’s leaving.

i am glad.

i don’t sleep with sluts.

i guess am good.

Friday, March 14, 2008

Love for reading DIRECTLY PROPORTIONAL to advent of exams

I love reading. More so when the final university exams begin on the 7th day from today. I am sitting up on my bed staring at my notes. From the corner of my right eye, I see my mom standing at the kitchen door, acting as if she’s looking at the calendar on the wall behind me. Who is she kidding? Muahahaha.

My breathing eases as I see her go back to talk to the stove. I think of what is going to be there for lunch. I think what I’m going to get my girlfriend for our first anniversary. I hear my neighbour’s door shut. Then their scooter starts. May be the’s going to the market. I finished reading Pillars of the Earth last. Ken Follett’s wonderful work. It must be used as a texbook of creative writing. After it, I had picked up the Fountainhead. I look around, trying to remember where I had kept it after my last reading session.

I see it ogling at me from atop the TV, as if singing, “Come on baby, light my fire.” I look in the direction of the kitchen. Mum ain’t lookin’. Surely one or two pages won’t hurt. I reach for it.

Angel: What are you doing?

Me: (shrugs) Huh? What?!

Angel: You’ve got exams coming up!

Me: Wow, are you a mom too?

Angel: Oh no, I’m only a figment of your imagination.

Me: (Yawn) At least try to convince me with some originality! That line is from Ratatouille!

Angel: Oh, so you saw it recently?

Me: You bet! Yesterday night. Along with Memoirs of a geisha. Off with you now!

(Waves his hand across the air, trying to hit the angel.)

Mom comes in.

Mom: Whom were you talking to? Phone rang?

She looks behind me to see what I am hiding from her.

Mom: What are you hiding? Show me.

She sees the big paperback and looks into my eyes. I brace myself. I know the lyrics by heart. It’s all about how I already lost a year and how I had to undergo four years of BMM, when the course itself is only three years. I hate this part. It sucks off whatever little wish/ will there is to study for the exams. I mean, wasn’t I going to go back to my notes after only2-3 pages of the book? Okay, may be five. So what? I know my exams are coming up! Damn! It’s like being in a Pepsodent ad!

Mom’s saying something. It’s strange. I hear everything she says, still I don’t hear anything. I drop the book where I found it. “Sorry Fountain, later ok?”

I begin staring at the notes again. It says something about the Press Control of India being defunct. It calls it a toothless tiger. Hey! Isn’t that aapro Ball Thokre?